Feb 14th, 2012

This was the day that my ex boyfriend broke up with me for the hundredth time and made me walk a 30 walk home from the mall. When I got home I was done crying once again after hearing the same words over and over, and of course it was Valentines day. I believe I had to work this day as well, so I worked my shift that ended at 9:30 pm and when I came home my sister came into my room with the phone in hand with my dad on the line. My dad told me that our dog was really sick and that they don’t know if she was going to make it. He told me that I could come up to see her tomorrow if I wanted but I couldn’t because I had to work and finding a cover was really hard, especially last minute.

Feb 15, 2012

So the next day my sister went up to see her and I went to work thinking that I could see her on the weekend. My sister came home and everything was the same as it was the next day so I thought I would be able to see her, but when I came home my sister once again handed me the phone with my dad on the line to tell me this time that our dog Montana had died. I was completely crushed because everyone had gotten to go up to see her to say goodbye at least but I didn’t. Now every year on Feb 15th I put a picture up on facebook, write in my journal “R.I.P Montana,” and cry my eyes out because I miss her so much. 

Feb 15, 2014

My boyfriend called me to just to talk before he went to play video games to tell me sorry that he worked on Valentines day, that I won’t see him until Sunday and he knows the 15th is a hard day for me. I was good until he said that, I held back my  tears until we got off the phone and now I’m crying. I thought I would write this because maybe it would help a little bit but this is going to take a lot of time. 

I’m sorry I didn’t get to say goodbye to her, it honestly kills me all the time when people bring her up. I know she’s in a better place, not feeling pain or being sad. I just miss her like crazy. 

R.I.P Montana 
I love you,
I miss you,
and I’m sorry I didn’t say goodbye.